God is Pro-Choice? Freewill. Faith. Fear.
“God created things which have free will. That means creatures can go either wrong or right…” C.S. Lewis
I’m constantly asked why words are a big deal.
Because we’re burdened with experiences, both good and bad…and expectations.
But the baggage we’re carrying…is the words.
An easy example?
God is pro-choice.
Four words setting off an avalanche of more words.
Thoughts.
Assumptions.
Expectations.
Interpretations.
Perceptions.
Accusations.
Judgements.
Landing in a river of reactions.
Imagine if I wrote an article about faith and said, “I’m gay…” Same result even though I’m just in a good mood and happy.
I chose my words to simply show you yours. Not because mine are better – they’re probably not—but to show wordload in motion. Because many stopped reading to hear and started reading to calculate.
Words started making decisions before we notice…and before the truth arrives.
The fact of the matter is I simply re-framed a 1,600-year-old debate over free will with different words. Nothing more.
I fully admit, in less than 150 words I’m not winning friends or influencing people.
At all.
Some jumped the abortion debate. Others shut down over faith. That’s fine.
There’s no judgement.
Because I proved the point free speech really isn’t free.
The cost is clarity, conversations, and connections.
Hidden inside baggage.
______________________________
The first place people go for answers?
Google.
The last they trust?
Google.
We search, “Why am I so tired?”
“Why am I so anxious?”
“Why can’t I sleep.”
Because reaching out to a trusted friend to ask, “What’s wrong with me?”
Creates uncomfortable questions.
“What if they think…”
Then another…
“What if they tell…”
Assumptions stealing authenticity.
Postponing solutions, healing, and peace.
Fears…before facts.
Most of us hated word problems in math class…
We avoided our homework then and avoid the problem of words now. Which means we count the cost of authenticity—
Wrong…By half.
We prevent others from being authentic postponing their potential solutions, healing, and peace. Because we forgot they’re carrying baggage, too. Maybe that’s the reason we’re out in public, while avoiding the public.
With ear buds.
_______________________
The opposite of love?
Not the obvious answer – but that’s what we learned in English class.
It’s actually fear.
David Richo might have said it best…
“Fear is the opposite of love because it is conditional. It keeps us out of the water, it excludes. Fear is at the bottom of everything…Fear of perceived dangers is also the root of hate.”
That’s a long way away from, “…love your neighbor as yourself…”
Especially when words get in the way of having a conversation…and we worry about the first impression more than making a lasting impression.
So we settle for a friendly wave. And scrolling. Talking to and listening to people we’ll never meet, instead of people in front of us.
Choices.
Based on words heard, learned, and scrolled…that may or may not be true.
We’ve spent billions on words…Reading and learning to identify and fix “what’s wrong.” When an intentional pause costs nothing.
A pause to let facts catch up as we unpack the baggage from words.
Unrealistic expectations.
Labels given by others.
Stigmas from moments we weren’t at our best.
Failures that were never final…but words made them feel like they were.
A purposeful pause to ask better questions.
Instead of, “What did you want to be when you grew up?”
“Are you the person you wanted to be when you grew up, or what others want you to be?”
One gets quick answers. The other?
A pause.
The reason we get exhausted? We’re trying to control actions – ours and others—because we believed actions speak louder.
When words were already making the decisions.
The choice isn’t better actions, or even consistent ones.
The choice is whether we pause.
To get the facts.
____________________
Word police? Not at all…
Pause police? That could be cool.
“Take a break. You’re overthinking again.”
Said with a smile…The voice in our head is usually not as nice.
For me?
My mental cue is the prefix RE. A prefix, that grew into a “pre-fix.” That allows me to pause and edit in real time before and during conversations and activities. As well as afterwards to look back with out judgement…and re-author possibilities for the next time I land in a situation.
No complex strategies.
No top ten lists.
No new words…that end up fighting with old words.
Just rediscover you…by retiring the labels, expectations, and stigmas that no longer work and aren’t needed.
For those still struggling with the title? Joshua 24:15 “…choose for yourselves this day who you will serve…” Funny thing about the verse…there were no threats of condemnation, damnation, or hell to the Israelites before a decision had to be made.
Just the truth…before the choice.
Click here for more on why words are important.
Interested in a WORDshop one on one or for your team? Shoot me an email at gscott@yourdailyre.com
My name is G. Scott, and I write about the power…and burden of the words shaping people, organizations, and outcomes. I’ve served over thirty years in the corporate environment scaling operations and sales initiatives and teams regionally and nationally.
I have been blessed with my wonderful wife Alyson, three great kids and my first granddaughter.
The most important part of my work? You. I hope you share your story!
If this has been tough, please reach out to a trusted friend, pastor, or counselor
