The Fastest Way to Clear a Room. The Speed of Words, Labels, and Assumptions
Want to see how fast words work?
“I love Jesus.
The assumptions you’re making…
Perceptions.
Expectations.
Judgments.
Regardless of whether the thoughts are positive or negative…
That’s wordload.
It just decided whether you kept reading…or closed the window.
In about forty words.
Quick, isn’t it?
Three words.
Creating an avalanche of words.
That start making decisions.
You’re not wrong. We all do the same thing.
We all carry wordload.
I’d be far more concerned if you had no reaction. I’d be questioning if you were still alive. Because we crash into words every day.
“We’re getting divorced.”
“I was fired.”
“I’m gay.”
The problem isn’t the sentences. They’re scary to say. Even scarier for the other person to hear.
The problem is the reaction we choose.
One worries about what they said.
“Should I have told them?”
“What do they think about me now?”
The other worries about what to say next.
“What am I supposed to say to that?
Because both are left unsaid.
Nothing gets said.
I don’t get invited to poker night because I’m a Christian.
Or divorced.
Or out of work.
Or gay.
I don’t get invited because we trade the value of the person…
For a set of assumptions.
Perceptions.
Expectations.
Judgements.
“He’s interesting.”
Evolved into…
“That’s interesting…”
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Do words get the kids to school on time?
Pay the bills?
Earn the promotion?
No.
Our choice between using words…or letting them use us does.
I listened to a young woman tell me the story of a church camp counselor tell her the problem she had was “…just hormones…”
Two weeks before the young lady attempted to take her life.
She’s never been back to church.
And has no plans to ever return.
I saw myself all over that story.
I had invested so much energy angry at words said to me, I had ignored the words I said to others.
I wasn’t just the young lady…
I was the counselor.
It took me forty-five minutes to recover enough to simply drive home.
That’s the moment I learned the power of words.
I do love Jesus.
The best days of my life were when I turned my life to Christ. My wedding. The days my kids were born.
Yes, I’ll grab a beer with you anytime. Unless you’re a recovering alcoholic OR believe a Christian shouldn’t drink. Or if you just don’t like to drink, we can stick with Coke.
It’s up to you…not me.
And yes, fully aware I just set off more wordload.
Someone is thinking I’m hypocritical.
Or heretical.
The funny thing?
More people inside the church will have a problem with my writing than outside the church.
Some got stuck on divorced, out of work, or gay.
Others are still on the story of the young lady asking,
“Are you blaming the counselor?”
That answer is a hard no.
I’m not.
I’m blaming the words that led to…
“Oh that’s interesting but it’s just hormones.”
Instead of,
“You’re interesting. Tell me what’s going on.”
I finally understood Jesus’s warning about having to give account for every careless word we speak.
And think.
It took watching a young woman live the consequences of them.
Regardless of whether you believe or not, Jesus made it clear we’re to be good stewards of our talents and resources, how we take care of others – especially the vulnerable and broken, how we use our influence, and how we use our words
And each start with the words we think…
That lead to the ones we say.
I think this is why John called Jesus “The Word.”
Because he knew words either hold us captive…
Or set us and others…
Free.
_______________________
Interested in words and language deciding our direction? Check more out here
My name is G. Scott, and I write about the power…and burden of the words shaping people, organizations, and outcomes. I’ve served over thirty years in the corporate environment scaling operations and sales initiatives and teams regionally and nationally.
I have been blessed with my wonderful wife Alyson, three great kids and my first granddaughter.
The most important part of my work? You. I hope you share your story!
If this has been tough, please reach out to a trusted friend, pastor, or counselor
